Two genders Two Tails

Hey guys!

Sorry I’ve not written this week. It has been busy and I’m still recovering from being taken to hospital last week which mainly I’m just tired (suppose that’s nothing new haha)

As for those who read my last post I’ve finally posted that I will be walking down the road to transition to female earlier that I thought and had an appointment with my GP which was on Wednesday 17^th February.  A couple of days before I was due to go I was getting nervous not because I knew I was starting my journey where I will be transitioning (I’m shitting my pants about that) but how I would say “I identify myself as female.” Like how was I?

After speaking to a few trans* friends I heard how they came out to their doctor and it helped a little. The issue I was having was whenever you go to the doctors they always say something along these lines of “how may I help you today?” That was where I was thinking in my head and I would stop, I didn’t know why, it wasn’t the nerves kicking in god knows what it was. Anyway the day came and guess what the doctor said those lines and when I was advised to take a breath I didn’t and came straight out with it.

Trying to remember what I said is hard at best of times, but it was along the lines of “Over the last 2 years I been suffering gender dysphoria, and I want to be referred to a gender specialist to help me with my identity.”   He looked at me with great interest and asked me to describe it in more depth, which I said about when it first started was in April 2014, where I came across the word Bi-Gender, and at that time it was where I felt I was female at times, and I was really learning about myself and how I felt about myself, but over these recent months I’ve started to back track and I’ve noticed that I’ve been doing certain things that I’ve done was feminine from being a child.

I also explained about my childhood wasn’t great, so trusting people etc and my whole feelings I shut away and to a point where a few years ago my own Mother said I was heartless. I explained that only recently I opened my emotions and that is where I started feeling like I was in the wrong body and was starting to identify myself more as female. Which if I never shut myself feelings off I probably would have transitioned many years ago.

After talking for a few minutes he told me that the whole process is drawn out and is an extremely long journey, and just to be seen by a gender specialist can be a good while off. I explained that I read that Leeds GIC Clinic had bad reports and that the waiting list was around 2-3 years so called which he was shocked that the list was that long. He explained to me that the surgery I’m at has two transgender patients on their books who are children and that they were sent to Leeds which had good results but Leeds is one of two GIC Clinics for children in the UK.

My Doctor said that he will have to ring me to discuss where I can go and the options that I have so hopefully I will hear from him soon and get on the waiting list for a GIC Clinic where it’s looking like it will be Nottingham or Northampton, but I’m not really looking into so soon. The next step is hearing from my doctor.

I will post updates of when that happens and I’m still thinking about making videos, I just hate hearing my voice on a mic and I won’t even sound anything like a girl, so it’s a hard choice and something I’m anxious about.

Thanks for reading